I woke up still holding my poster and got the whole convoy to sign it. After last night’s shenanigans The Lion Boys had continued their night and had not returned to the hotel again. Once again Chris and I stayed up all night watching the door worried sick, we will have to give them a stern talking to once they return. We have only been here one day but a routine has been developed already - breakfast, Russian SpongeBob, then lunch downstairs. Some selfish Mongolians were using the Irish pub for their wedding reception, so we were forced to go to the chicken resteraunt next door. The resteraunt proudly displayed a quote on their wall which said "They came to eat and found the food was actually alright so stayed for more", I can't disagree with the quote - the food was alright.

 

It turns out we have all been hiding that we are secretly gigantic nerds and all wanted to go to the museum of natural history to see some dinosaurs. After lunch we set off walking to find the museum in the city centre. It seems my first impressions of the city weren't quite representative. The centre is a very city-esque with all the trappings of a normal city – there are shops, modern office blocks, and large squares. On the walk to the museum we followed an under cover agent. "How did we know?" I hear you ask, well he was wearing a t-shirt with it printed on which is hardly the most effective disguise. When we reached where Hunger said the museum would be we couldn't see anything, apart from all the normal things you see in a city like buildings and traffic.

 

We stole a little bit of WiFi from a nearby coffee shop and confirmed the building next door was supposed to be a museum. When we reinvestigated the letter stapled to front door shed light on the situation. It was indeed one of those museums you read about in guide books. Unfortunately what wasn’t advertised in the guide book was that the building was about to cave in, and they had been forced to close. While we stood outside discussing our next move a woman came to the door and told us the museum "wasn't working", I suggested she checked the fuel pump but she must not have understood the joke because she just looked at me blankly for awhile then went back inside.

We had geared up for a solid day of geeking, so we walked over to the Museum of Mongolia. The museum covered every minute detail of Mongolian history from the stone-age, through Genghis Khan, to the modern day. My favourite item on display was a medal which Mongolia had won at a fair in Bulgaria. It didn't say what the event was but they had won bronze and were clearly very proud of their accomplishments. If you could spare a moment I think we should all congratulate the entire country of Mongolia with a round of applause - Next time go for the gold medal Mongolia, we all believe in you.

 

We walked back to the main square, we were doing a lot of walking today, to look at the Genghis Khan statue outside the government building. The statue was basically a copy of the Lincoln memorial, only Genghis was chubbier and looked Mongolian. While we were making fun of their national hero a hoard of angry Mongols came across the square, but for some reason they all had their tops off and were waiving banners. At first I thought it might be a gay pride parade but it turned out to be a fitness parade. I'm not too sure what a fitness parade entails, but it seemed to just be a bunch of moronic steroid junkies shouting about how fit they were to every passer-by.

The rally had been stressful on everyone's fragile bones so the others went to find Ceces Massage Parlor - somewhere another rallier had raved about on Facebook. I wanted to catch up on these blogs and Chris didn't want to go to a dodgy massage parlor, so we sat in the room until they reappeared. Miles and James were back in the hotel after another night of late night karaoke and falling asleep on other team's floor.

 

It was the Australians last night in Mongolia before they flew off to different places - Sharkey was flying back to work, Huanger was flying to South East Asia to volunteer at a gibbon rehabilitation centre, and Adam was flying to South East Asia for a piss-up. To celebrate them finally leaving us we went for a nice meal at a bar across the street. In the restaurant we realised we had become the obnoxious tourists we hate so much. We had walked in and immediately rearranged their resteraunt because their table layout didn't suit our requirements. Over dinner we stared at each other in disgust, felt bad in the room with ruined fung shui, and heard all about their time at the massage parlor.

 

The massage had apparently been very relaxing until the end, when a happy ending was offered. The masseuse asked something in Mongolian, then tapped the groin and raised her eyebrows. Sharkey had politely refused and was offered tea instead - Yes Mrs. Sharkey he told us he refused, but I wasn't there and the free tea does sound too good to be true doesn't it? The masseuse had laughed at Matt because of his timid shyness. He was given a small towel which, when the masseuse moved to massage his upper thy, left a lone bollock hanging out. Apparently he had tried to move the towel back but it was met with more laughter and her moving the towel again - after his awkward massage he looked upset that he wasn't even offered a happy ending. Huanger had opted for a scrub before his massage, which apparently left him feeling cleaner than he ever had before. Once he came through for his massage Matt and Sharkey took this moment to give him a helpful hint, to say yes to the one question she asks. Of course he had said yes and awkwardly accepted his fate, although he did look the most relaxed/pleased at dinner. After dinner we went back to the hotel for a few beers and to smoke some victory Cuban cigars on the hotel balcony.